Omake Zone 05: It's Hard to Explain
SHINRA TOWER, 66TH FLOOR MIDGAR DISC 02 - JANUARY 2008
“You play games, don’t you?” Shizune asked innocently. “Who told you that?” Evan said with more venom than she had intended to. “Hehehe,” Shizune laughed nervously as she scratched the back of her head and beamed a smile borrowed from memory. “Erm, that’s not important, really. Basically, this is a kind of online game.” “Like an MMORPG?” “Yes and no,” Shizune said. “Sort of.” Evan raised an eyebrow. The commander of Turk unit R0-414 had been walking down the hall of their office headquarters when she noticed that Shizune was in the office space that had been provided to her for paperwork. A Turk in the office is no abnormal thing, but the fact remained--Shizune was almost always exclusively in the lab, not her office space. This in and of itself was enough to pique the commander’s curiosity. Even stranger still was the fact that Shizune appeared to be playing an online game--a game that Evan had never heard of. This had to be remedied immediately. “So,” Evan probed, “this game isn’t an MMO, but requires constant connection to the InfoNet.” “Affirmative,” Shizune said. “Whatever for?” “Well, you basically connect to a virtual world. You control this thing here called an ‘avatar’...” Shizune said, as she gestured for Evan to look at her screen. “Your avatar is male,” Evan said. Again, Shizune began laughing like the wrong brand of innocent sunshine. “Yeah, well,” Shizune stammered, “I thought it would be helpful to assume the identity of the opposite gender to rhetorically consider the hypothetical situations a man might face. You know--for infiltration…” “You’re going to think about thinking about being a man by playing an online game?” “Well, it’s hard to say that you can actually ‘play’ this ‘game’,” Shizune said, frequently abusing the quotation-mark-finger gesture. “What, it’s not a ‘game’ that can be ‘played’?” Evan asked, now mocking Shizune with her own finger gestures. “How do you win?” “That’s just it,” Shizune said. “There are no real ‘rules’--you just sort of exist...” Evan blanked. “What?” Shizune laughed nervously again, and Evan was beginning to think that she caught Shizune doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing in the first place. “You just hang out with other avatars, or maybe build things? I don’t know--it’s hard to explain.”
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Evan left Shizune to her strange machinations on this anomalous ‘game’ and decided to make herself a coffee. A game with no rules? How in Gaia do you play such a thing? As Evan neared the lounge door, she overheard Valerick talking with Riwin. “Alright,” Valerick said, “I’ll meet you there.” “Meet him where?” Evan blurted out as she appeared suddenly in the doorway. Valerick and Riwin actually jumped. “Erm, ahn-rn…” Valerick mumbled below his breath. Riwin looked to be in abject horror. “Come again?” Evan said, her query laced with threat. “In Valhalla!” Riwin suddenly shouted. Evan beetled her eyebrows in momentary thought. “Is that a new bar? I’ve not heard about this place before.” Valerick and Riwin exchanged uneasy looks, and Evan turned her gaze once more on her executive officer. “Valerick,” Evan said slowly, like an accusation. “What were you saying earlier?” Valerick couldn’t look his commander in the eyes, and his gaze fell on the floor in front of Evan’s polished shoes. “Ahn-rn…” Valerick muttered again. The syllables sounded heavy, as if laden with guilt. Or shame. “Don’t make me ask again.” “Online!” Valerick spat quickly. “I said, I’ll meet him online…” “Valhalla? Online?” Evan said, raising her voice. “You both better start explaining yourselves.” “Hey, hey, no need to get upset, Boss,” Riwin said, adopting his signature double-hands-up, forgive-me-pose. “Valhalla is a city in the online, virtual world of Secondary Existence.” “What.” Evan said flatly. Valerick began to answer, adjusting his necktie as he spoke. “It’s an online world that you can visit as an av-” “Avatar?” Evan interrupted. “Yes!” Riwin exclaimed. “That’s exactly it! Do you know about it?” “I don’t play video games,” Evan said like a knife to the throat. “Yeah, that’s right,” Riwin said. “Sorry, I forgot about that. But yeah, Secondary Existence is like an online game, but you just hang out with other avatars and you can even go to roleplay in re-creations of cities from famous video games.” “So?” “Well,” Valerick said, “Riwin and I were really into the Last Delusion series as kids. I know, I know--these days the series is all about being pretty and lacking good content, but back in ‘97, LDVII came out, and it was definitely one to remember.” “Yeah! And some people went and recreated the city of Valhalla from the game in Secondary Existence!” Riwin was quick to add. “So we can go there and hang out there and even pretend that we are characters from LDVII--from before the events of the actual game, of course!” “Your enthusiasm over this game is sickeningly sweet,” Evan said. Both Valerick and Riwin had no idea whether Evan meant that as a compliment or not. “Hmm. It’s not really something one could consider a ‘game’, you see…” Valerick said, eyes closed in thought. “Shut up!” Evan cut in. “Just shut it--I already heard this philosophical lecture from Shizune!” Valerick and Riwin exchanged genuinely puzzled looks, and the three Turks were silent for an uncomfortable beat. “Shizune plays Secondary Existence?” Valerick and Riwin said at the same time. “Yes…” Evan conceded. “What. The. Fuck…” Riwin said. “She told us she had never and would never try it,” Valerick said. “Well, I just saw her logged in to whatever that is you’re all talking about, and she was a man.” “A human man or a Fuzzy man?” Riwin suddenly asked. “Excuse me?” “Oh,” Valerick stammered, “A ‘Fuzzy’ is a kind of anthropomorphized humanoid avatar. People find that they can truly be themselves when they pretend to be an over-evolved canine character. It's hard to explain...” “Like this!” Riwin exclaimed, as he flashed his cellular phone screen up to Evan’s face. Evan saw a screenshot of Secondary Existence that featured a large congregation of what appeared to be human-adult-sized dogs, cats, foxes, and/or wolves all congregating at some kind of central park fountain. Strange netcode names floated above each of their heads. Most of them had their hands up to mid-torso in what looked like a typing pose, but there were no keyboards. Some of them appeared to be dancing… “What.” “These are Fuzzies,” Riwin said, as if proud of the definition. “So, did Shizune’s avatar look like a big animal or was it a normal human male?” Evan was aghast. “Just...just get away from me. All of you.”
